If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you furniture for your house
  (Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)
  If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love.
    If I Had $1000000
  I'd build a tree fort in our yard.
  If I Had $1000000
  You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
  If I Had $1000000
  Maybe we could put a refrigerator in there.
  (Wouldn't that be fabulous)
    If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you an exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (All them crazy elephant bones)
  If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
    If I Had $1000000
  We wouldn't have to walk to the store
  If I Had $1000000
  We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
  If I Had $1000000
  We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.
  (But we would eat Kraft Dinner. Of course we would, we'd just eat more.
  And buy really expensive ketchup with it.
  That's right, all the fanciest Dijon Ketchup. Mmmmmm.)
    If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
  If I Had $1000000 (If I Had $1000000)
  I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
  If I Had $1000000 I'd buy your love
    If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
  If I Had $1000000, If I Had $1000000
  I'd be rich.